Thoughts on life and Scripture...

Saturday, December 23, 2017

Reverse The Curse In Your Marriage

There are thousands of books on marriage. There are many radio programs and ministries that are dedicated to fixing your marriage. I spent a lot of time when I was growing up on tractors listening to Christian radio. I heard many programs explaining how to make your marriage better. Now all this information is helpful. But it was on my honeymoon when I heard something that really clarified why we have marriage problems and what the solution is to our marriage problems.

   We were driving into Oregon listening to John Macarthur's teaching on the fulfilled family, a sermon series on Ephesians 5:22-6:4. He said something that I won't forget. Here are two quotes from that sermon series.


   "People will ask me what’s the key to your marriage or what’s the key to your family, how is it that your family is so close or you are close to your wife and you have such a wonderful relationship and I can just go back to this.  There is no magic, there is no formula, there is no gimmicks.  It’s not a  question of how many times did we do this or how many times did we do that or who was in charge of this or what kind of processes or methods did we use.  It’s simply a question and it has to start in my heart, am I committed to obedience to the Spirit of God, am I committed to the controlling influences of the Word of God, am I going to live out a Christian life?"  



"Because of fallenness there will be conflict.  You have to go back to the spiritual dimension to end it and that’s what’s so wonderful about this passage that we are looking at and you can go back to Ephesians now, that the solution to the conflict in marriage is spiritual and it starts with allowing the Holy Spirit to control your life, letting the Word of Christ dwell in you richly, obeying the Spirit of God as he reveals his will through the will of God.  Only the power of the Holy Spirit can reverse the curse in a home.  Where you have a Spirit filled person in the home, you have hope.  You ever try to pick a fight with a Spirit controlled person? Ever try to pick a fight with a totally joyful person that just has rising joy in their heart? Ever try to pick a fight with somebody who is thankful for everything, even the conflict?  Ever try to pick a fight with somebody who is totally submissive.  Very difficult.  Where that exists there is hope.  It’s a spiritual issue.  Conflict goes where the Holy Spirit dominates."  



     I thought these quotes were so good, that I should leave it at that. But perhaps a word or two is in order. Why does your marriage suck? Why do you have problems in your marriages? The answer is that you have two sinners who got married to each other that have some sanctification issues. "What is the source of quarrels and conflicts among you? Is not the source your pleasures that wage war in your members? You lust and do not have; so you commit murder. You are envious and cannot obtain; so you fight and quarrel. You do not have because you do not ask" James 4:1-2 


    How do you fix your marriage conflicts? In almost every case, the solution is more heart and life holiness. If we pursue holiness and fellowship with God, then there will be some improvement in our marriages. Now you might be married to an unbeliever, even though they may profess to be a Christian, which in that case may mean that the more godly you are, the more they will despise you. Unregenerate people hate the light. John 3:19-20. But even unbelievers may willingly live with a godly Christian. 

   With all the marriage advice books out there, you would think that the Bible is full of marriage tips and helps. But there is very little said on marriage. This is because if you follow the commands in Scripture to walk in holy living, then your marriage will not suffer. But don't try to live a godly life for the sole purpose of improving your marriage. Live to please and know the Lord, and when you do so, the other areas of your life, including marriage, will be affected for the better.
     

   So if your marriage is in trouble, go to God in repentance and ask Him to help you to love your spouse. Use the means of grace that God has given; prayer, Bible reading, preaching...etc. Don't worry about trying to change your spouse. You can't change them anyways. You have the responsibility before God to love your spouse, even if you think they are your enemy. God even calls you to love your enemies. Does love rule your home life?


"Therefore if you have been raised up with Christ, keep seeking the things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your mind on the things above, not on the things that are on earth. For you have died and your life is hidden with Christ in God." Colossians 3:1-3 
   




Brad



    

Monday, December 18, 2017

The Perfect Wisdom of Our God

God is wise. This can be defined in this way; 'His choice of the highest end and the best means to that end.' Simple, right? Easy to understand--God is wise. He does what is best to achieve the highest end, which is His glory and the good of His people. But, how does this apply in every day life? How can we live this out? How can we turn our knowledge of God's wisdom into wisdom on our end--that is applying our knowledge?

We were studying the wisdom of God in one of our last Bible Studies. God is wise so we can be comforted when trials come, knowing it is for the highest end. All the trials that occur are for the good of those that love Him and for His glory. He is constantly at work in our lives for our spiritual good and for His glory.

As we were learning this, I was dealing with a baby who refused to sleep. When I finally got him to sleep, a short time later another child started crying and then woke the baby up. Usually our baby is asleep almost immediately--we never hear him in the evenings. But he was up all evening. I was tired. When the Bible study members left I felt like I was ready to cry--what was I going to do with this crying baby? Why was he crying? I was already so tired, how could I handle a late night? Frustration oozed out of every pore.

My husband graciously took the baby, told me to go to sleep and I headed to bed. But, I could not sleep. I could still hear him crying whenever my husband stopped walking. So I started to pray, 'Lord, please let him sleep, let us sleep...' and then I stopped as a thought came to mind. God is wise. He knows why the baby is crying. He knows that it is what is best right now, even though I don't understand it. He is in control of this situation.

Now, instead of praying that the baby would stop crying, and that we could get sleep, I hopped out of bed, ready to take over for my husband. I was now armed with the knowledge and the joy that God is wise--that in His wisdom, this was the best means for the highest end. I realized that this crying baby was the means that God had chosen to fulfill His purposes. I didn't (and still don't fully) understand what those purposes were, but I found such joy in knowing this and in resting in this truth.

Knowing that God is wise we can find joy in each situation we find ourselves in. We ought to put aside all grumbling and complaining, as no situation is out of His control. He has wisely brought about each and every trial for His glory and our good. All praise and glory to Him!

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:8-9

~Fenna

Sunday, December 17, 2017

Don't Play The Goat

    As some of you know, we have a few goats on our farm. Some month ago we bought a sheep. We hoped that the sheep and the goats would get along together. But the sheep was not accepted by the goats. The sheep has been here for a number of months, and she is still isolated from the goats. A couple of weeks ago we bought a male goat for breeding purposes. Right away, the goat was accepted into the small goat herd. Meanwhile the sheep is still ostracized. There is a good lesson here about spiritual things.

  Jesus told His disciples "If the world hates you, understand that it hated me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love you as its own. However, because you are not of the world, but I have chosen you out it, the world hates you." John 15:18-19.  Jesus  compared believers to sheep and unbelievers to goats. Matthew 25:31-33. So hopefully you can see where this is going.

  Goats and sheep don't mix. Neither do Christians and the world. We are different by nature. The Christian is born of God with the Spirit living within him. They are a new creation in Christ and so they love different things. Christians have different goals, ambitions, and purposes. We belong to a different family, kingdom and country.

   The world loves darkness and sin. They belong to the kingdom of darkness. Since they love darkness, they hate the light. They have no love for the true God. Men and women of all religions and beliefs can find some common ground. They all belong to the same family and kingdom. But there can't be fellowship between the sons of darkness and the children of light.

     A Christian must expect to be excluded from the world, like my sheep was excluded by the goats. We may be friendly with them and even enjoy their friendliness. But there is a world of difference between us.We don't mix well like oil and water or sheep and goats. If you can have deep friendships with unbelievers, if you can have no problems being partners together in some enterprise, if you are comfortable at the parties of the world, if you don't feel out of place in worldly discussions, then you have a problem.

    Christians that can feel at home among the people of this world have a problem. They may be weak spiritually and have an unhealthy appetite for the things of this world. These sheep act too much like goats to be an offence. But they are in great danger. For in this case the Christian is like a sheep among wolves who will tear them to pieces. These kind of sheep may not even be sheep. They may be goats that only pretend to be sheep at times.

   A Christian who lives a godly life, will be despised by the world. A healthy sheep is one who evangelizes the lost, who stands fast on truth in life and doctrine, and who lives for a heavenly purpose and kingdom. If you do this, you will shine in the darkness, and the darkness will run from you or try to snuff you out. When this happens, it is a good sign. Rejoice and be glad for great is your reward. So don't act like a goat, be a good sheep.

And by the way, we sold our sheep recently. Since it would not eat with the goats and it had to dig through the snow to find grass, we felt that it was time for it to go. Thankfully we found a good home for the sheep, with some other sheep friends. But I don't think there is any spiritual lesson to this part of the story.

Brad